And It Never Feels Out Of Place

"There is something hypnotic in a tiger [...] She has that quality. She treads so softly that there is no sound, and you won't know she's there at all. But if she doesn't like something, she'll stop and hold your gaze. There's a kind of psychological ballet: who will outstare who? In such cases, you should probably not suddenly turn tail because the scent of fear passes quickly. You must back off slowly, slowly- especially if the tiger has a kill, or if she's a mother with cubs: she makes a step, you make a step- you must not run away. And only when you leave the territory she think is hers, only then can you run."
- The Tiger: A True Story of Vengeance and Survival, John Vaillant.

The Year of the Tiger and then Rabbit. To make an understatement, that would not be the weirdest transition ever. From a somewhat ferocious and dominant tiger to a docile, fluffy bunny. Is it only me or do you see something wrong with this picture?

Maybe the year 2010 was full of surprises- like a tiger silently stalking, springing out at it's prey. An unpredictable mammal- like a cat. Only more volatile, proportional to it's size.

But I beg to differ. Rabbits can be very unpredictable. Since I have not dealt with tigers before, I shall use cats as an example and multiply the effects by say.... 872901471802328915840135781? Fair enough right?

So, cats are very affectionate. As much as they pretend not to acknowledge your existence, they thrive on your affections. If you ignore them enough, they come to you, hoping to get a belly rub. Cat's love to play. There's just something in their tiny brains that makes them a little inquisitive and go completely berserk. But there's a telltale sign when cats are going to turn mad as a Hatter. They start pawing you and/or things, the whites of their eyes show, they literally jump 3 feet in the air when you scare them and they skid when turning into corners.

If you say rabbits are harmless creatures, you have no idea. Once upon a time, my cousin had 2 rabbits. To cut a long story short, one died. The only surviving one [I don't remember it's name but let's just call it Ricky shall we?] escaped from it's cage but decided to stick around. Now, this is in the village where there's no gates or fences and the land is quite big. As soon as Ricky got his paws on the soft earth, he turned completely insane. Eating every single thing in sight, digging up roots and basically wrecking havoc around the farm. He managed to build up quite an attitude and became the badass of the farm. He started out by chasing the chickens and the ducks and one fine day, decided to stalk human beings. I kid you not when I say he chased my aunt around the farm and managed to bite her ankle. At first we thought it was an isolated incident but no, it went on biting other people. I started to wonder if it developed a taste for human meat.

It wasn't long before my aunt from Sibu [stating the particular area she comes from should give you an indication of her palate] decided to trap the bunny. I don't wish to discuss how she did it, but she did. And guess what? The menace of a bunny became dinner. Oh yeah. Rabbit stew, rabbit meat cooked in bamboo and skewered rabbit meat was on the menu that night. Were we sad Ricky died to fill our bellies? I didn't care. All I knew was that Ricky is no longer a threat and his death gave us life. Well, not really. I mean, if we didn't eat rabbit meat, we'd probably just go mainstream and eat chicken so we won't exactly die.

I can conclude that rabbits are no different than tigers and if rabbits are the size of tigers, they'd probably be just as badass or even more badass than tigers. Don't let that fluffy white exterior fool you. That's what they want you to think.

So in the spirit of Chinese New Year, have a great one! And if you're born in the Year of the Rabbit, do not fret. Remember, you're the ultimate weapon of looking innocent yet well, not.

Signing out,
cheongsam-WANT!

Maybe This Time

The author is currently updating her blog using Mozilla Firefox in an attempt to make the font size smaller. She does not know if it will work but she says it's worth a shot.

Last night I walked out of my room and into the kitchen. I heard the sound of plastic rustling and I immediately knew it was our 'friendly neighborhood lizard' or more affectionately known as a cicak. As I turned the tap on, I silently prayed that it would just stay in the plastic bag until I leave.

But nooo.. The cicak had to jump out of the bag and onto the kitchen counter. If I were to translate it's thoughts into English, it was probably thinking: Oh, someone's coming. *jumps out of bag* SURPRISE!

This immediately triggered a cascade of reactions from yours truly. "Holy sheep! Oh my goat! *bleep bleep* What the *bleep* are you- Oh *bleep* Good grief *bleep*" I instinctively grabbed anything near me- another plastic bag. I threw it at the flippin reptile and watched the plastic bag flutter to the floor AND THE LIZARD DIDN'T EVEN FLINCH! asahjfklfdhjal!!!

Then without warning, it jumped [yes, I swear it JUMPED] down from the kitchen counter to the floor. Cornered, I grabbed yet another plastic bag [why was there an infinite supply of plastic bags, we'll never know] and threw it at the accursed reptile and once again, watch it flutter in vain and land approximately 2 feet away from the lizard.

Then, as quick as it appeared, it disappeared into the darkness leaving me in the silence of the kitchen with the occasional drip from the faucet. Cicak- 2. Abigail- 0.

Signing out,
je t'adore

Hear Me Say I'll Stand Up For My Friends.

Once again, no, I'm not being emo. It's a part of a song. I really should stop having to explain myself. I mean seriously, dear readers [that is if there's any left. I don't even know who reads this anymore] I think you know me enough to know that I post up song lyrics as title because I'm uncreative and I enjoy making people wonder what is on my playlist.

Anyway, the new constellation has caused chaos to the world as we know it. People are starting to understand why their horoscope didn't really describe them. Others are wondering if they should change their tattoo of their horoscope on their behinds. Some are even faced with a dilemma knowing that their significant other is no longer their "soul mate" after discovering that the two star signs are constantly at war and can never get along, hence contemplating a major break-up. Whatever it is, taking the words of Big Bang Theory's character, Sheldon Cooper, we shouldn't be participating in in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily define constellations at the time of one's birth somehow affects one's personality.

Moving on, this semester has definitely started with a bang. Results were shocking and it proved that we needed more than just mere studying. Understand, comprehension. Call it whatever you want, memorisation just doesn't cut it. Oh well, now to prepare myself for a possible warning letter from beloved JPA to my mum.

Next week looks like it will be an awesome week for me. Overlooking the fact that I'm going to be staying back from Monday to Wednesday to complete an assignment for something called Unit 3 and then I'm free from Thursday all the way till Sunday the following week. I'm starting to like my laboratory sessions :D

And now to end with late new year greetings.

To my lolspeak buddies, ohai!
To my makan buddies, yam cha sometime?
To my shopping buddies, SALES NOW! Can we go?
To my cats, meow.
And to my friendly neighborhood Spiderman, there's a spider in my room near the curtain. Get rid of it, please?

Signing out,
Duct-tape-is-silver